I had a pretty good June, considering. My grandmother passed away on June 22nd, so the last week of the month was spent with family, celebrating her life, and laying her to rest. I'm not at all disappointed in my achievements. :-)
Here are July's goals.
Health
1. Continue with my weekly workout routine. A minimum of 3 work outs per week, no matter how small.
2. Continue to drink more water.
3. Start and finish the Advocare 24 Day Challenge.
Home
1. Make a minimum of one new recipe per week for dinner. Healthy!
2. Menu plan, and stick to it.
3. Bring lunch to work a minimum of 3 days a week.
4. Grocery shop on the weekends, or Thursday evening.
Personal
1. Sign up for professional pictures. Start researching prices.
2. Read three + books for fun.
3. Accomplish 3 items from my 101 things list.
4. Accomplish 10 items from my "running" to do list.
Monday, July 1, 2013
June Goals - Recap
Health
1. Continue with my weekly workout routine. A minimum of 3 work outs per week, no matter how small. I have to say, I'm kind of proud of this one! It wasn't always easy with work and school, but I managed.
2. DRINK MORE WATER! Another *must* do goal! Another one I'm proud of! Drinking water is tough for me, but I was successful.
3. Start and finish the Advocare 24 Day Challenge.
Home
1. Make a minimum of one new recipe per week for dinner. Healthy!
2. Menu plan, and stick to it.
3. Bring lunch to work a minimum of 3 days a week. Done! Yay!
4. Grocery shop on the weekends, or Thursday evening. Done! Yay!
Personal
1. Sign up for professional pictures. Pick a date with Shani.
2. Read two + books for fun.
3. Accomplish 3 items from my 101 things list. I only managed to accomplish 1. But that's okay, it's better than nothing.
4. Accomplish 10 items from my "running" to do list.
3. Start and finish the Advocare 24 Day Challenge.
Home
1. Make a minimum of one new recipe per week for dinner. Healthy!
2. Menu plan, and stick to it.
Personal
1. Sign up for professional pictures. Pick a date with Shani.
3. Accomplish 3 items from my 101 things list. I only managed to accomplish 1. But that's okay, it's better than nothing.
Friday, June 21, 2013
Fitness Friday (2)
Here's the recap to week 2.
It wasn't as great as week 1. It's been a whirlwind of a week, with so much to accomplish in the evenings. Last Saturday, Alex got a flat tire on the bike so we had to take the bike to the shop and drop it off Saturday afternoon. Our gym at the apartment has a remote to get into it. The remote was on the keys to the bike, which we didn't get back until Tuesday evening.
Sunday & Monday - I did a kettle bell workout. For those of you that have never used a kettle bell, I recommend going out and getting one, PRONTO! Not only do they do amazing things with just a 10 lb weight, but the various exercises you can do with them are incredible. I don't know, I'm weird I suppose, but I do enjoy the kettle bell exercises I've found. And since A has really helped me learn how to do squats accurately, I feel like I'm getting an incredible workout in my apartment. (And it's free!)
Tuesday - We had to go get the bike and pick up a baby shower gift for a baby shower we're going to this weekend, so no work out was had that day.
Wednesday & Thursday - YAY FOR CARDIO! I finally was able to get in some cardio. I discovered something else this week too. I can take my iPad to the gym, open the Kindle app, increase the font size (I'm blind without glasses - but I don't wear them in the gym) and get some reading in too! It's like I'm being productive AND working out at the same time. Plus, it makes working out not seem so... chore like.
I'll do one more day of cardio tonight, just to get in my 5 days for the week.
Eating - now that's a differnet story. It's definitely been somewhat of a struggle this week. School has been overwhelming, so I haven't eaten perfectly. It hasn't been terrible, but not nearly as awesome as it was week 1. My plan is to completely change that for week 3.
Oh! And weight loss so far - 0.8 lbs. I was hoping for a much greater weight loss, but anything is better than nothing. So yay!
It wasn't as great as week 1. It's been a whirlwind of a week, with so much to accomplish in the evenings. Last Saturday, Alex got a flat tire on the bike so we had to take the bike to the shop and drop it off Saturday afternoon. Our gym at the apartment has a remote to get into it. The remote was on the keys to the bike, which we didn't get back until Tuesday evening.
Sunday & Monday - I did a kettle bell workout. For those of you that have never used a kettle bell, I recommend going out and getting one, PRONTO! Not only do they do amazing things with just a 10 lb weight, but the various exercises you can do with them are incredible. I don't know, I'm weird I suppose, but I do enjoy the kettle bell exercises I've found. And since A has really helped me learn how to do squats accurately, I feel like I'm getting an incredible workout in my apartment. (And it's free!)
Tuesday - We had to go get the bike and pick up a baby shower gift for a baby shower we're going to this weekend, so no work out was had that day.
Wednesday & Thursday - YAY FOR CARDIO! I finally was able to get in some cardio. I discovered something else this week too. I can take my iPad to the gym, open the Kindle app, increase the font size (I'm blind without glasses - but I don't wear them in the gym) and get some reading in too! It's like I'm being productive AND working out at the same time. Plus, it makes working out not seem so... chore like.
I'll do one more day of cardio tonight, just to get in my 5 days for the week.
Eating - now that's a differnet story. It's definitely been somewhat of a struggle this week. School has been overwhelming, so I haven't eaten perfectly. It hasn't been terrible, but not nearly as awesome as it was week 1. My plan is to completely change that for week 3.
Oh! And weight loss so far - 0.8 lbs. I was hoping for a much greater weight loss, but anything is better than nothing. So yay!
Monday, June 17, 2013
Randoms...
Today, I'm feeling very random. I have 1,000,000 thoughts swirling through my head, and not near enough time to put those random thoughts down on paper. For the most part, I'm okay. I'm better than okay. I have a life I love, a boyfriend (although we're just "hanging out") that I love and adore, an amazing family, friends that I can't even begin to say enough about. And yet - I feel like I'm back in a holding pattern for life. A and I have talked about this, so it's not like I'm springing things upon him. I don't know. It's a weird feeling. I'm not a patient person, but I constantly pray for patience. Ironic? Maybe.
On Friday, my mom called and let me know that my grandma has gone into renal failure. What that means at this point, we don't know. We're waiting on blood work and the doctor's input this morning. My parents are in Kansas now. But I would imagine that I'll be making an impromptu trip to Kansas with A and my baby brother, M, sometime in the very near future. It'll be nice to be around family, but it'll be hard to bury one more grandparent. I pray for peace and understanding. Peace for my family, that all of us will find comfort in knowing that my grandma is with the Lord, her husband, and her parents. I pray for understanding as to why her life for the past 5 years has been so unfulfilled for her. She doesn't know who her kids or grand kids are when we visit. I pray for wisdom that all of us will know how to handle the drama and issues that are bound to follow her passing, and that we'll all know how to deal with the issues at hand. Yesterday, at church, we sang Amazing Grace. We've haven't sang Amazing Grace in the past 6 months, but yesterday, that was our closing worship song. Then J. John (our visiting speaker) prayed for health, for us, for our loved ones. I cried. Hard, ugly, emotionally releasing tears. I prayed for God to just take my grandma home. After church was over, A led me to the front. He's never done that, but he knew what I needed. A seems to always know what I need. It's the most surreal connection I've ever had with another person.
So here's a most random twist of events. I posted this blog this morning around 9 am. Here it is now, 4p. My parents are coming home. Apparently, the nurse who told my mom and my aunt that my grandma was in renal failure was wrong. VERY, VERY, VERY WRONG! Today was the first day that my parents were able to talk to the doctor. They got to Kansas on Saturday, so the doctor wasn't in again until today. The blood work that came back from the lab shows elevated levels meaning that her kidneys aren't working at optimal level, but she's physically no different this week than she was a month ago. Ahhhh!! I'm so frustrated for my parents and my aunt and uncle who dropped everything to make the trip to Kansas to be with my grandma. I'm glad they were able to be there, to see her again, and I'm thankful that they are all able to do that with their careers. But man.
So here's a most random twist of events. I posted this blog this morning around 9 am. Here it is now, 4p. My parents are coming home. Apparently, the nurse who told my mom and my aunt that my grandma was in renal failure was wrong. VERY, VERY, VERY WRONG! Today was the first day that my parents were able to talk to the doctor. They got to Kansas on Saturday, so the doctor wasn't in again until today. The blood work that came back from the lab shows elevated levels meaning that her kidneys aren't working at optimal level, but she's physically no different this week than she was a month ago. Ahhhh!! I'm so frustrated for my parents and my aunt and uncle who dropped everything to make the trip to Kansas to be with my grandma. I'm glad they were able to be there, to see her again, and I'm thankful that they are all able to do that with their careers. But man.
Father's Day was hard. On us both. I called my step-dad and wished him a Happy Father's Day. I called my dad too, but his phone went to voice mail. He hasn't called me back. I really hope everything is okay.
It kills me to watch A struggle with his own relationship with his son, and the pain he feels in missing his dad, his grandfather and his uncle who were both such amazing father figures in his life. I struggle with the idea that we may never be able to have kids, and I may never see the love in his eyes for our children. I don't know that for sure. My body is capable of amazing things. I'm trying to be patient.
I struggle that my ex-husband got to cheat on me, completely IGNORE his vows to me, married his new wife (the same woman he moved in while I was still living there) 30 days after our divorce was final, and his new wife is pregnant with a son already. As miserable as I was, and as unhappy as I was, I never once went outside our relationship for emotional or physical fulfillment. He did. I struggle with the idea that THEIR relationship started out as a lie, and yet - he will get the joys of being a father. He didn't even want kids. I struggle with his physical and emotional belittlement, and how I still feel like I can't do things because for 10 years I was told I couldn't. I struggle with anger towards him. Oh! And to know that the only reason I know about his child is because he thought that was the last thing he had to hurt me with. Ha! And, figuring out that he'd spent the last 10 years maintaining yet another LIE, led me to thank God for protecting ME. Let's not even take into consideration the number of times he asked me to work things out (while maintaining a relationship with his current wife... the power of social media is a powerful thing), even so far as to ask me on a date for New Year's Eve, three months before their wedding date. I have the text messages. A has read them as well.
But, I also know that he has to be the one to handle his demons. He has to be the one to answer for his actions to the Lord. I'm not the final judgement day, nor do I want to be. In some weird way - I know I have to figure out how to forgive him. In my heart, I know that God won't bless A and I with a child, once we're ready, until I find forgiveness in my heart. Forgiveness isn't easy. But I'm trying. Not for him, but for me.
I'm also incredibly thankful that God blessed me with A. He's the most patient, kind, loving, caring, God fearing man, I've ever encountered. He's gentle, compassionate, inspiring, simply amazing. I love his heart for the people he loves, and more so, for the complete strangers. I'm awed by his desire to want a real relationship with me, based on trust, honesty, and love. I'm just humbled, every single day.
Patience isn't my virtue. And I told you these thoughts were random.
Friday, June 14, 2013
Fitness Friday (1)
Here's my first accountability post. And I have to say, I'm beyond proud of myself this week. :o)
After having a pity party for one, I woke up Saturday morning and got a workout in. It wasn't the best, I didn't meet any PR or anything, but I did it. Sunday - the same thing. I skipped Monday as a rest day, which was totally planned. Did the elliptical on Tuesday, lifted weights on Wednesday, rested on Thursday, will get a quick run in tonight, and plan on doing some weight training and running on Saturday. My weeks are going to go from Sunday - Saturday, so I will have achieved my goal of 5 work outs this week! Yay!
Food - for the most part I did pretty well. I went over calories on Monday, but that was due to poor planning on my part due to a work function for a new employee. Other than that - I stayed within calories each day. I won't say that my eating will always be perfect, or that I won't have some slip up days, but I will do my best to stay on track.
It's amazing how just one week can make a difference. I'm already feeling better, although the scale hasn't moved even .1 lb. That's okay. I'm hoping for a big loss next week!
Alex is trying to convince me to start doing the P90X workouts with him. I think I'm going to try it. I just have to remember (which I'm still struggling with) that I've never been the athletic type, and I have to work for it. I wasn't blessed with a high metabolism. I won't ever shape up as quickly as he will. Partly because I'm a female, and partly because he's always been insane physically. If he's willing to do this with me and for me, I'm on board.
For the start of this journey, I'd have to say that week 1 was a success.
After having a pity party for one, I woke up Saturday morning and got a workout in. It wasn't the best, I didn't meet any PR or anything, but I did it. Sunday - the same thing. I skipped Monday as a rest day, which was totally planned. Did the elliptical on Tuesday, lifted weights on Wednesday, rested on Thursday, will get a quick run in tonight, and plan on doing some weight training and running on Saturday. My weeks are going to go from Sunday - Saturday, so I will have achieved my goal of 5 work outs this week! Yay!
Food - for the most part I did pretty well. I went over calories on Monday, but that was due to poor planning on my part due to a work function for a new employee. Other than that - I stayed within calories each day. I won't say that my eating will always be perfect, or that I won't have some slip up days, but I will do my best to stay on track.
It's amazing how just one week can make a difference. I'm already feeling better, although the scale hasn't moved even .1 lb. That's okay. I'm hoping for a big loss next week!
Alex is trying to convince me to start doing the P90X workouts with him. I think I'm going to try it. I just have to remember (which I'm still struggling with) that I've never been the athletic type, and I have to work for it. I wasn't blessed with a high metabolism. I won't ever shape up as quickly as he will. Partly because I'm a female, and partly because he's always been insane physically. If he's willing to do this with me and for me, I'm on board.
For the start of this journey, I'd have to say that week 1 was a success.
Friday, June 7, 2013
Those feelings...
This is a hard subject for me to blog about - but here goes nothing...
As women, I think we constantly strive to "feel good about ourselves." We want to look in the mirror and feel beautiful. It doesn't matter if our spouses tell us daily we're beautiful. If our friends tell us that we're amazing. It simply doesn't matter, because all that matters to us is how we feel about ourselves. That's hard.
Any who knows me, knows that for the majority of my life, I've struggled with my weight. I was "skinny" in high school - but I still wasn't confident in my body. I've never been athletic or toned. But I've always been me. Fast forward several years to an unstable relationship full of stress and drama, and a diagnosis with PCOS, and the weight piled on. For a girl with a 5'4" frame - pushing 200 lbs is unhealthy. I went to see my primary doctor, and she told me at 27 years old, that if I didn't do something to get the weight OFF, I'd be a pre-diabetic by the time I was 28. Ouch. I did really well for a couple of years, and managed to lose 25 lbs. That's not terrible, I guess, and in my heart, I know I have to be proud of *that* accomplishment.
However - today, I went shopping on my lunch break, and as I stood in the mirror of TJ Maxx with tears streaming down my face, I realized that I had another change to make. I've allowed life to get in the way of ME, and my health.
Last week in church, Pastor Robert Morris preached on "Taking Care of the Temple." You can listen to his sermon here... Taking Care of the Temple. However, something he said really hit home for me. If I don't take care of the body that God created for me, and take care of God's temple, then this body may shut down before I've achieved the plan that God has set for me. What would that leave me with then? I have an amazing set of friends and family that I know will be supportive in this journey to lose the next 25 lbs. I know that if I want to have children in the next few years, getting this weight off is imperative to allowing me to have a natural birth like I want. More than that, I want to look in the mirror every day and be proud of the body standing before me. I don't want to look in the mirror and see a woman with tears in her eyes looking back at me, but a woman who is proud of the work she's achieved.
So after stealing an idea from Mandy over at Music and Baseball, I've decided that each Friday, starting with NEXT week (hold me to this followers!) I will post a Fitness Friday post with a recap of where I'm at, what progress I made for the week, what my progress will be *hopefully* for the next week, etc. I'm holding myself accountable, and I hope you'll help hold me accountable too. Call me out if I don't post. I can handle it.
So after stealing an idea from Mandy over at Music and Baseball, I've decided that each Friday, starting with NEXT week (hold me to this followers!) I will post a Fitness Friday post with a recap of where I'm at, what progress I made for the week, what my progress will be *hopefully* for the next week, etc. I'm holding myself accountable, and I hope you'll help hold me accountable too. Call me out if I don't post. I can handle it.
Saturday, June 1, 2013
June Goals
Who needs an introduction... I mean, who reads these things any way besides me?! Goals are such a touchy subject for me, because I feel ridiculously vulnerable if I don't get them accomplished. Either I'm setting myself up for failure each and every month, or I'm going into this knowing that the likelihood of accomplishing each of these is slim. Luckily, June is *so far* a pretty light month in terms of plans. We'll see.
Health
1. Continue with my weekly workout routine. A minimum of 3 work outs per week, no matter how small.
2. DRINK MORE WATER! Another *must* do goal!
3. Start and finish the Advocare 24 Day Challenge.
Home
1. Make a minimum of one new recipe per week for dinner. Healthy!
2. Menu plan, and stick to it.
3. Bring lunch to work a minimum of 3 days a week.
4. Grocery shop on the weekends, or Thursday evening.
Personal
1. Sign up for professional pictures. Pick a date with Shani.
2. Read two + books for fun.
3. Accomplish 3 items from my 101 things list.
4. Accomplish 10 items from my "running" to do list.
Health
1. Continue with my weekly workout routine. A minimum of 3 work outs per week, no matter how small.
2. DRINK MORE WATER! Another *must* do goal!
3. Start and finish the Advocare 24 Day Challenge.
Home
1. Make a minimum of one new recipe per week for dinner. Healthy!
2. Menu plan, and stick to it.
3. Bring lunch to work a minimum of 3 days a week.
4. Grocery shop on the weekends, or Thursday evening.
Personal
1. Sign up for professional pictures. Pick a date with Shani.
2. Read two + books for fun.
3. Accomplish 3 items from my 101 things list.
4. Accomplish 10 items from my "running" to do list.
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