So I got great news today. :o) My medical records have been approved so to speak, and I finally have an appointment scheduled for an endocrinologist. Woo hoo! Hopefully we're on our way to recovery. My appointment isn't until August 18th, but at least it's scheduled.
Many people have asked, why an endocrinologist? So many people associate PCOS with just being infertile and having trouble trying to conceive a child, but it's so much more than that.
Over the next 90 days, I'm going to really focus on my eating, water consumption, exercise, as well as temperature charting & tracking my periods so that I have as much information as possible to present to her when we meet.
I'm excited!
Wednesday, May 14, 2014
Monday, May 12, 2014
The best...
I pretty much spent the entire weekend blissfully quiet, if that makes any sense. But, for a girl like me, blissfully quiet isn't really my thing. A knew that something was up, but I wasn't ready to talk about it, and he doesn't pry. He realizes that the minute I'm ready to open up about what I'm feeling, I will.
So last night, we got home from my mom's house celebrating my birthday and Mother's Day, and A told me he had to run to the store. I stayed at home, studying for my CPA exam, but he was gone for awhile. I didn't think much of it, he leaves for the store sometimes at night, so it's not like it's completely out of the norm for us.
When he returns, he brings with him a dozen pink long stem roses. AND CUE THE TEARS!
I came clean with him on what I was feeling, even that I was thinking of asking him to leave because I didn't feel like he deserved to be with someone who couldn't for sure give him a child someday.
And let me just tell you this, I'm incredibly fortunate. And so loved. While I've always known that to an extent, I think this weekend just reaffirmed that for me. God gave me the one person in this world that is strong enough to pick me up when I feel down, to be my rock when I feel weak, and to help shoulder this burden. I'm forever blessed.
And on a side note:
I did speak with my doctor today. She said that she's not surprised that the progesterone would start another bleeding cycle. Progesterone is the hormone in the body that starts your period. I think just speaking to her gave me a bit of reassurance that my body is kind of doing what its supposed to do. She was pleased that the progesterone stopped my bleeding for a bit, so that's positive news.
I also am waiting to hear back from the endocrinologist. I found one that a.) takes my insurance, b.) is super close to work, and c.) has GREAT ratings on various websites online. I had to send her my medical records, and she's received those, but now she reviews them and talks to my OB/GYN before she agrees to take my case. So I'm waiting to hear.
So last night, we got home from my mom's house celebrating my birthday and Mother's Day, and A told me he had to run to the store. I stayed at home, studying for my CPA exam, but he was gone for awhile. I didn't think much of it, he leaves for the store sometimes at night, so it's not like it's completely out of the norm for us.
When he returns, he brings with him a dozen pink long stem roses. AND CUE THE TEARS!
I came clean with him on what I was feeling, even that I was thinking of asking him to leave because I didn't feel like he deserved to be with someone who couldn't for sure give him a child someday.
And let me just tell you this, I'm incredibly fortunate. And so loved. While I've always known that to an extent, I think this weekend just reaffirmed that for me. God gave me the one person in this world that is strong enough to pick me up when I feel down, to be my rock when I feel weak, and to help shoulder this burden. I'm forever blessed.
And on a side note:
I did speak with my doctor today. She said that she's not surprised that the progesterone would start another bleeding cycle. Progesterone is the hormone in the body that starts your period. I think just speaking to her gave me a bit of reassurance that my body is kind of doing what its supposed to do. She was pleased that the progesterone stopped my bleeding for a bit, so that's positive news.
I also am waiting to hear back from the endocrinologist. I found one that a.) takes my insurance, b.) is super close to work, and c.) has GREAT ratings on various websites online. I had to send her my medical records, and she's received those, but now she reviews them and talks to my OB/GYN before she agrees to take my case. So I'm waiting to hear.
Sunday, May 11, 2014
Mother's Day
I said I wouldn't talk much about PCOS on this blog, but well, it's my blog and I'll do what I want.
I've had one of the roughest weekends known to man in a LONG time. It has honestly felt like everything that could go wrong, has. Without getting into too much detail that no one cares to know about, I had a VERY long period in April, and after going well past the time it should have ended, I called my doctor. She put me on a 10 day dose of progesterone. Things were going great, I had energy again, felt wonderful, the bleeding had stopped, and then the prescription ran out. And I'm back to where I started. Not only am I back to where I started, but it's my birthday and Mother's Day weekend. Anyone who gets their hormones messed with my natural or unnatural means knows that it sometimes makes you feel irrational.
All day yesterday, I went from crying to angry. ALL FREAKING DAY! I contemplated over and over again telling Alex to leave, because he deserved to be with someone who could give him a child someday. That someone probably isn't me. Then I cried myself to sleep. Woke up around 5:15, cried some more, got up and laid on the couch, cried some more. I'm not sure I have any tears left to cry.
Mother's Day is a joyous occasion to celebrate all the Mothers out there. But what about the women that aren't mothers? The ones who have struggled emotionally with the fact that they may never have kids? The ones who have been to the doctor, time and time again, hoping for something that will give them a bit of encouragement? And get nothing. Because PCOS won't go away. It can't be treated, and while the symptoms themselves can be treated, the overall picture doesn't change. And that makes me feel hopeless and broken and sad. Incredibly sad. Sadness that means I'd rather be alone than drag anyone else through this miserable journey.
I know I should be happy, because I have a lot of good in my life too. But it always seems to go back to this.
I've had one of the roughest weekends known to man in a LONG time. It has honestly felt like everything that could go wrong, has. Without getting into too much detail that no one cares to know about, I had a VERY long period in April, and after going well past the time it should have ended, I called my doctor. She put me on a 10 day dose of progesterone. Things were going great, I had energy again, felt wonderful, the bleeding had stopped, and then the prescription ran out. And I'm back to where I started. Not only am I back to where I started, but it's my birthday and Mother's Day weekend. Anyone who gets their hormones messed with my natural or unnatural means knows that it sometimes makes you feel irrational.
All day yesterday, I went from crying to angry. ALL FREAKING DAY! I contemplated over and over again telling Alex to leave, because he deserved to be with someone who could give him a child someday. That someone probably isn't me. Then I cried myself to sleep. Woke up around 5:15, cried some more, got up and laid on the couch, cried some more. I'm not sure I have any tears left to cry.
Mother's Day is a joyous occasion to celebrate all the Mothers out there. But what about the women that aren't mothers? The ones who have struggled emotionally with the fact that they may never have kids? The ones who have been to the doctor, time and time again, hoping for something that will give them a bit of encouragement? And get nothing. Because PCOS won't go away. It can't be treated, and while the symptoms themselves can be treated, the overall picture doesn't change. And that makes me feel hopeless and broken and sad. Incredibly sad. Sadness that means I'd rather be alone than drag anyone else through this miserable journey.
I know I should be happy, because I have a lot of good in my life too. But it always seems to go back to this.
Tuesday, May 6, 2014
Chipotle
I'm beyond annoyed. I adore Chipotle, I always have. I've been a big fan of the place since the first Dallas location opened. However, something happened today while I was at Chipotle that made me not so impressed anymore.
Our military does not get the recognition they deserve, and it's incredibly thoughtful when an organization/restaurant/location/etc. will offer them a discount. I'm not saying that it's required that every entity do so, but it's definitely a nice perk. What tends to annoy me, and quite frankly, piss me off is when these establishments offer a police discount, but not a military discount.
I love our law enforcement personnel. I think they put themselves on the line to protect our laws on a daily basis, and I'm not saying that they too shouldn't get a discount. But what I am saying is that without the military protecting our freedoms, the police would have no laws to police except that of a ruler or dictator.
So, I'm going to add Chipotle to the list of places I'll no longer frequent.
Our military does not get the recognition they deserve, and it's incredibly thoughtful when an organization/restaurant/location/etc. will offer them a discount. I'm not saying that it's required that every entity do so, but it's definitely a nice perk. What tends to annoy me, and quite frankly, piss me off is when these establishments offer a police discount, but not a military discount.
I love our law enforcement personnel. I think they put themselves on the line to protect our laws on a daily basis, and I'm not saying that they too shouldn't get a discount. But what I am saying is that without the military protecting our freedoms, the police would have no laws to police except that of a ruler or dictator.
So, I'm going to add Chipotle to the list of places I'll no longer frequent.
Friday, May 2, 2014
High Five for Friday
These are going to be quick... but I wanted to keep posting the positive things going on in life.
1. I paid for the first section of the CPA exam yesterday. I'm currently waiting for the NTS (Notice to Schedule) so I can register for an exact date to take audit. :-)
2. My birthday is officially just over a week away!
3. PINK IMPACT is less than a week away! I'm so looking forward to this year. The positive of being in Conference B is that you get to see all the sneak peaks from Conference A.
4. I've lost 4.6 lbs so far on Advocare's 24 Day Challenge. I'm pretty darn proud of myself!
5. But today was hard. It's our Day 2 spread pot luck at work, and I ate a piece of cake. It was yummy, but I'm not sure what it did to my overall day. The good news is that I stayed away from the enchiladas and tacos, and ate a salad instead.
1. I paid for the first section of the CPA exam yesterday. I'm currently waiting for the NTS (Notice to Schedule) so I can register for an exact date to take audit. :-)
2. My birthday is officially just over a week away!
3. PINK IMPACT is less than a week away! I'm so looking forward to this year. The positive of being in Conference B is that you get to see all the sneak peaks from Conference A.
4. I've lost 4.6 lbs so far on Advocare's 24 Day Challenge. I'm pretty darn proud of myself!
5. But today was hard. It's our Day 2 spread pot luck at work, and I ate a piece of cake. It was yummy, but I'm not sure what it did to my overall day. The good news is that I stayed away from the enchiladas and tacos, and ate a salad instead.
Thursday, May 1, 2014
May Goals
How in the HELL is it May already?! This year is flying by. While that's a blessing because the things that I can hardly wait for are approaching very quickly, I'm stressing because time is going by sooooo fast!
Here are my May goals:
Just for your info:
S - Specific
M - Measurable
A - Attainable
R - Relevant
T - Time-Bound
HEALTH
1. Get my butt in the gym. Since started the Advocare 24 Day Challenge on 4/28, I need to up my working out. I'm going to do the Lean Body for Her Challenge. While the actual "challenge" is over, I have the work out plan, and I'm going to focus on that for the next 12 weeks. Goal date: 5/31/2014
HOME
1. Hang curtain rod & curtains for living room. Goal date: 5/11/2014
3. Hang IKEA shelves above desk, and organize the office space. Goal date: 5/11/2014
PERSONAL
1. PASS AUDIT! I sit for the first section of the CPA exam in May. I'm nervous, but I'm ready. I'm prepared. And by the time the actual test gets here, I will have studied my behind off! :-) Goal date: TBD based on when my exam gets scheduled.
Here are my May goals:
Just for your info:
S - Specific
M - Measurable
A - Attainable
R - Relevant
T - Time-Bound
HEALTH
1. Get my butt in the gym. Since started the Advocare 24 Day Challenge on 4/28, I need to up my working out. I'm going to do the Lean Body for Her Challenge. While the actual "challenge" is over, I have the work out plan, and I'm going to focus on that for the next 12 weeks. Goal date: 5/31/2014
HOME
1. Hang curtain rod & curtains for living room. Goal date: 5/11/2014
3. Hang IKEA shelves above desk, and organize the office space. Goal date: 5/11/2014
PERSONAL
1. PASS AUDIT! I sit for the first section of the CPA exam in May. I'm nervous, but I'm ready. I'm prepared. And by the time the actual test gets here, I will have studied my behind off! :-) Goal date: TBD based on when my exam gets scheduled.
3. Start work on baby shower decor items. Goal date: 5/18/2014
3. Sew maxi skirt from knit fabric. Goal date: 5/25/2014
3. Sew maxi skirt from knit fabric. Goal date: 5/25/2014
April Goals Recap
April was a good month for GOALS! It's kind of exciting to be able to check stuff off the ol' list. :-)
HEALTH
1. Do some sort of physical activity, 3x per week. Goal date: 4/30/2014
Done! While it wasn't intense work outs, heavy weight lifting, etc. it was a physical activity. Alex and I started walking several nights a week around the "circle" of our apartment complex.
HOME
1. Hem curtains for living room. Goal date: 4/12/2014 Completed: 4/12/2014
2. Hang curtain rod & curtains for living room. Goal date: 4/12/2014
So, yeah. I kind of ran into a snag with this one. Apparently, hanging the curtain rods within 6" of the window isn't going to be possible with the way the framing is done. All I was left with is a GIGANTIC hole in the wall. So this one is on hold until I can get to Lowe's, get some wall putty, and some paint to fix the hole. Maybe by the end of the month?
An update update: Well, the hole still remains in the wall. I haven't made it to Lowe's. Oops. This one will be showing up again for the May goal list. :-)
3. Hang IKEA shelves above desk, and organize the office space. Goal date: 4/12/2014
After the issue with the curtain rods, I decided to hold off on this one for fear of MORE holes in the walls. LOL.
PERSONAL
1. Finish bunting for Eve. Goal date: 4/17/2014 Completed: 4/2/2014
2. Meet with Jeana to start baby shower planning. Completed: 4/25/2014
3. Pick out fabric for baby shower decor. Completed: 4/29/2014
HEALTH
Done! While it wasn't intense work outs, heavy weight lifting, etc. it was a physical activity. Alex and I started walking several nights a week around the "circle" of our apartment complex.
HOME
2. Hang curtain rod & curtains for living room. Goal date: 4/12/2014
So, yeah. I kind of ran into a snag with this one. Apparently, hanging the curtain rods within 6" of the window isn't going to be possible with the way the framing is done. All I was left with is a GIGANTIC hole in the wall. So this one is on hold until I can get to Lowe's, get some wall putty, and some paint to fix the hole. Maybe by the end of the month?
An update update: Well, the hole still remains in the wall. I haven't made it to Lowe's. Oops. This one will be showing up again for the May goal list. :-)
3. Hang IKEA shelves above desk, and organize the office space. Goal date: 4/12/2014
After the issue with the curtain rods, I decided to hold off on this one for fear of MORE holes in the walls. LOL.
PERSONAL
4. Sew maxi skirt from knit fabric. Goal date: 4/30/2014
5. Start work on baby shower decor items. Goal date: 4/30/2014
I didn't get the maxi skirts sewn, and I haven't started working on the shower items, simply because I haven't received the fabric yet. But May. :-) Definitely May.
5. Start work on baby shower decor items. Goal date: 4/30/2014
I didn't get the maxi skirts sewn, and I haven't started working on the shower items, simply because I haven't received the fabric yet. But May. :-) Definitely May.
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